Better late than never....

I'm a month behind in writing my annual blog post to celebrate Ella's biggest day, her birthday. However, with three children four and under I find this to be my new norm.

February 3rd will always be one of the best days of my life, it was the day I became a mom to a beautiful black haired baby girl. On that day I would have never believed that she would be a blonde! Since that moment at 11:53 a.m. my life was forever changed with the new and exciting things she would bring to my life.

Ella is smart, outgoing and quick whited. She can make anyone laugh in a matter of seconds.She loves music and is constantly found singing, dancing or playing on her guitar. She loves all things Disney, especially princess. She loves school, swimming, and as of August 1st 2012 being a big sister. She tells me weekly that she never wants to be a mom (because she believes that being a mom equals a long hospital stay, ) but she is one of the best little mommies to her brothers. She holds them, gives them their binks and proclaims "shh shh I'm here" when they are sad. Her heart and love for others shows daily, but right now she is willing her hair to grow so she can donate it to locks for love.

Ella has learned to "stomp her feet" when she is mad, and knows how to put on the tears when she wants to get out of doing something.

She is sassy, loving, kind, and best of all, my little princess.

Happy Birthday (a month late) my darling little girl. You will always be "my baby!"

Thankful

This year I participated in the "thankful" segments on facebook. Each day I would say what I was most thankful for. This year, what I am MOST thankful for, is that my baby boys are healthy, happy and home. Being pregnant with twins brings on a lot of joy, but even more fear. I didn't know from one day to the next if my health was ok, they were growing appropriately, or when they might come. Thankfully though, I was healthy, the boys had challenges (21 NICU days learning how to eat), but are other wise healthy, and we are all home together safe and sound. I am blessed with three amazing children, and an even more amazing husband. Thankful doesn't even seem the most appropriate word for this year, blessed better summarizes it!

 Aiden-3 mths 3 weeks

 Ella being sassy

Liam 3 months 3 weeks

Not always mom of the year...

This has been a rough week for me. It is my last week at home with the kids before I start back to work Monday, and everyone in the house is feeling the stress. Ella, seems to be the one most affected by this, and I can't say I have been dealing with it in the best way possible. Juggling three kids is not an easy task, especially when two of them are infants who "need you now!!" Between taking care of the babies, work stress for Bill, stress about me going back to work and just general craziness I fear Ella hasn't gotten the attention she also needs, and is showing this by refusing to pee. Tuesday started the craziness, after 13 hours of not going to the potty we ended up at Children's, where they cathed her. Yesterday it took a large slushie from the movies filling her bladder to the point of no return for her to go (16 hours after the cath, with no other potty time in between), and now today, again she has refused to go. I should have told her it's ok, I know she is upset and worried about mommy going back to work. Instead, and I hate saying this, I yelled at her and told her she wouldn't get to go to school if she didn't go. I felt so horrible after saying it, but after a long time thinking about it I realized something. I am not perfect. I am not the perfect wife, mother, daughter, etc. I do what I can and try to do my best, but at times I am going to fail and I can't knock myself down about it. Instead I will apologize to my daughter for yelling at her, and hug her tighter than ever before. I will spend time snuggling, coloring or doing whatever it is she needs to feel like she is getting the love she is so desperately asking for. And next time I will do better. I will praise and love her for how awesome she is, rather than getting upset she didn't go.  If she doesn't go, I know that eventually she will. She can only hold it for so long before her bladder just can't hold anymore. This too shall pass, but at least I am better now for going through it!
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No, you may not touch....

 

Liam-10 weeks

Aiden-10 weeks (below)

When Ella was a newborn I recall getting annoyed by the amount of people that thought it was acceptable to touch her. Strangers would walk up and rub her feet, touch her face, etc. My mind would scream loudly "back off you germy person, my baby is not for you to touch." Of course I would just smile and pray that it ended quickly and that she wouldn't get sick. I didn't think it would be possible, but with the twins it has gone from touching them, to touching me and taking pictures of them (yes strangers have now taken pictures of the babies.)

It has been different being a mom to newborn twins, vs mom to a newborn singleton. Ella of course was adorable, and attracted attention wherever we would go. The twins however, seem to be a hot commodity. No matter where we go we hear, "oh twins?", "oh there are two of them (yes there are we aren't just crazy people pushing around empty baby seats)", "do you have twins? (again, really. Nope we don't, we just borrowed someone elses baby, who is the same age as ours.)", etc. This weekend though, hit an all time high. We are used to people coming up to us and the babies wherever we go. When Ella and I play restaurant she now pretends to be the waitress and tells me, the customer, how cute my babies are. We weren't prepared for the lady from China who found it acceptable to touch my breast trying to figure out why I wasn't breastfeeding, then subsequently take the picture of myself and Aiden. I know that I have beautiful babies, but in what world is it acceptable to take pictures of someones child without permission, or to touch someone in an intimate area without permission.

As horrible as this all is I still find myself restraining the urge to scream, "back off" to the many strangers who approach us, touch the babies, and now have taken pictures of them. If you are a parent I know you feel my pain in this matter, if not you will some day understand.

So for now I think a new sign will be on the babies onsies that states " I know Im cute, but hands off please!" 

Growing boys....still so small

As I get ready for bed, I look into the big blue eyes of both of my boys and Im amazed at how "big" they are getting. Tonight as I write this, and listen to their little snores, I'm overwhelmed by everything that has happened over the last two months. Two months ago we were blessed with these two little men, who lived 21 days in the Nicu....two months later I got to spend another week in the hospital this time having my gall bladder removed. At dinner I experienced the worst pain I'd ever had (yes worse than labor) and decided to go to the ER. Two days later I was in surgery and two days after that back under for a scope. The pain was not fun, but what was worse was staying alone in the hospital away from my three beautiful babies and my husband. I missed kissing my sons little noses each night before putting them to bed. I missed hugging my little girl as tight as possible and telling her to have good dreams...in a small way I even missed my husband's snoring. However, being in the hospital, alone most of the time allowed me to reflect on how precious life is, and how blessed my life is. I have three beautiful babies, and amazing husband, and a church family that rallied around us to ensure we were fed, our babies were cared for while my husband attended to me, and prayed over me for safety and healing. I made it through two procedures, had no issues with anesthetic, and have healed relatively fast. I have two little guys who have grown and begun to show their little personalities. I have a daughter with the biggest heart who loves me with all of her being.

It's been a crazy two months, but a blessed two months. Aiden has gone from 4.9 lbs to 8.4 lbs and Liam has gone from 5.7 lbs to 9.6. They eat 4 ozs each meal, and are starting to smile. They follow us with their eyes and bat at their toys. They are simply amazing, Ella is simply amazing...and life is even more amazing! (top 3 Aiden, bottom 3 Liam)

One Month Old

Liam and Aiden are officially one month old. Yet their actual age is considered 0. They both look so big to us, and both are officially over six pounds. They both seem huge to us, seeing as they were so tiny when they were born. Aiden has reflux and is now on medication, which seems to be helping somewhat. Liam has been spitting up more and we suspect that he will also be started on medication. Aiden was born with hypospadias and will require surgery to fix it. (Hypospadias =the pee hole on his penis is not in the right spot) Thankfully it is minor, and surgery will be easy for him. Both boys are growing like weeds, and are more and more alert...especially at night! We love watching Ella as the big sister. She hates to see them upset and will do anything she can to try and soothe them (say shhh it's ok Im here now, try to give them a paci, or entertain them by singing a song.)

These boys are such a blessing and we can't wait to see what the next month brings.

Liam 1 month

Aiden 1 month

 Liam-1 month

 Aiden 1 month

Ella-being adorable as always!

20 days later.....

20 days .....typically do not feel like they take that long to go through. However, 20 days in the NICU with our twins, felt like an eternity. In one way we could hardly believe that the babies were born 20 days prior, but on the other hand, it felt like an eternity. We knew going into this delivery that the boys could need some NICU time, but we never imagined it could take a baby 20 days to learn how to eat. We are so thankful for the staff at Kettering's NICU, but we are even more thankful that our amazing sons are home. We had many people praying for us and their well being, and we know this helped our boys get home. We can't wait to start this crazy journey of caring for twins, and being a family of five.